The Road to Ren

Summer Pictures ( I finally got a camera that works)

2010-06-25T11:26:00.002-04:00

Asian Festival

Bryson Family reunion.

Working on my flowers, not there yet.

My Dad and Aunt.

Graduation Parties and family.

Sweet smiles.

Eden and her "cousin Sophie"

Eden at Field Day, ready for the water games!

My brother and I.

Relaxing on the pontoon boat.

And now for a little DRAMA.....

We went to see Olympic Skaters at a Susan G Komen skating for Breast Cancer show. Johnny Weir and some other Olympic skaters were headlining. Just thought I would add a little drama to my pictures, he he.

Swimming lessons. Ren is a natural.

My little mermaid. Who knew mermaids don't like to get their faces wet?

Rachel soon to be a Buckeye!

Rachel

2010-06-18T09:34:00.004-04:00

Driftmier Hall where she spent a lot of time.

The traditional

picture under the famous arches

This post is long past due. Rachel my oldest daughter graduated from The University of Georgia this May. Go Dawgs! I had the pleasure of going to her graduation. Rachel, we are so proud of you! Rachel graduated with a BS in Biomedical Engineering. She has been accepted to Ohio State University to complete her graduate degree and will be moving home soon. I can't wait to have her home and close again! Right now Rachel is on a mission trip in Israel. You can read about her trip on her blog http://rachelchilders.blogspot.com/

Brother and sister :-)

Winter Fun

2010-02-12T09:00:00.004-05:00

These pictures are of different snows we got this year. The kids had a blast playing in it with dad, while I stayed inside and watched ;-)

This last picture is of the last big snow but is only HALF of the snow we actually got!

Caleb's Graduation!

2010-01-06T10:13:00.004-05:00

(white arrow is pointing to Caleb)

This December we had a lot to celebrate! Caleb graduated from Georgia State University! We attended his graduation at the Georgia Dome and had a wonderful time! Caleb graduated with a major in English and is now working as a technical writer for a medical software company in Atlanta. Caleb we are so proud of you!!!!!

Grandma and Grandpa George on the Jumbotron

We had a wonderful celebration at Maggianno's for dinner and awesome food. Here are a few pictures from our dinner.

Proud brother and sister.

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-23T15:45:00.002-05:00

Day at the Zoo

2009-10-06T08:09:00.009-04:00

We had a beautiful day at the Zoo this past weekend. The weather was gorgeous and there were no crowds! Unfortunately my picture taking was horrible and then the batteries died in my camera so sorry for the lack of and quality of pictures. We all had a blast and stayed till we were ready to drop. The kids slept very well that night. The Columbus Zoo is one of the best in the Nation and huge!

Eden feeding the Lorikeets
Manatees
Posing- we are in that stage when I say "Smile" we get those fake goofy forced smiles, :-D I love these two faces!

Ren with a closeup view.

16 Years and This Man Still Rocks My World

2009-10-01T09:19:00.014-04:00

Mark and I have been married 16 years today and I love this man. For our anniversary he told me I put a smile on his face so he wanted to do something special for me. He said that because of this another smile would be given. So in honor of our anniversary He gave to SmileTrain!! Mark you rock!!! This is one of the coolest awesomest gifts EVER! He is a man after my heart and knows how to melt it. Thats what I call romantic.

This is us when we were dating (why do I look like a zombie here?!?!? You should of seen it before I tweaked the color, and yet he kept dating me).

This is us on our wedding day. We eloped with our children in attendance and my mom and step dad. Wow our hair has changed ;-).

We started out with 3 kids between us and he has loved my children as his own. Gotta love a man who does that!

Through the years

Mark is one of the most generous compassionate people I know. He has the biggest heart and has always been there for his family and friends. He is a good man. He is hilarious and the funniest person I have ever met. Life is never boring with him. He is extremely talented at what he does. If you need something done he is your "go to" guy. There is nothing too small like going on a mission to find a Bathtub Cabbage Patch Doll right before Christmas across the state or just helping around the house.Nothing is too big like putting together a National convention or speaking to 30,000 people. Not to mention running a National program and being in charge of a 196,000,000.00 (million) dollar budget. He gets it done.

The first group of children are now grown and on their own and in college. We are now a multi-generational family finishing up with round 2. We just returned from China with our youngest 6 months ago. Mark I love you for giving for giving me these two precious jewels and taking care of us. Love you Big Guy! You are the BEST!

A New Normal

2009-09-29T07:43:00.011-04:00

It has been 6 months now that we adopted our new little man. SIX MONTHS!! I know this will sound trite but it feels like it has only been weeks but yet it feels like he has been with us forever. It hasn't always felt this way. Just to be transparent I will say adoption is hard. It is probably the hardest thing I have ever done. The first time was hard and a year into the first adoption I thought I would NEVER do it again. Yet here I am finished with my second adoption. I will NOT do it again, LOL. Not because it was so hard but because I feel like our family is complete and because I am getting OLD! :-D Having small children in my mid-late-whatever-40's keeps me young but also reminds me how old I really am and the need to get/stay healthy.

We all had to make adjustments. After we came home from China it was such a whirlwind of change, everything felt so chaotic. Now it feels normal, six months later a new child, a new home, a new city, new routines, we have a new normal. And it feels good. It feels good to kind of be able to do things on autopilot again. Things I took for granted before like just getting up in the morning and getting ready, or going grocery shopping now go smoothly and on time. I am not constantly ticking off things in my head to do anymore I automatically do them. OK well that might be an exaggeration. The laundries done, the bills are paid, kids are relatively clean and playing together, groceries in the cupboard, the house feels like a home, we have a new church, everybody fed and for the most part happy. God is good...All the time!

Are things perfect? Absolutely not. The house is messy, we still have temper tantrums around here, we sometimes eat junk food (OK a lot, hey Chef Boyardee in a can is the new vegetable didn't ya hear? ). Dishes get done once a day sometimes, we all can be short with one another, etc etc... and I have a long "to do" list. Its all good. Life goes on and we have so much love in our home that I feel rich. Its good to have turned the corner.

Ren and the rest of us on his 4th birthday

MIA

2009-07-31T08:22:00.015-04:00

funny face "the warrior look"

We are still here! I know I have been missing in action for awhile on this blog. It has been nice to just get away from the computer for awhile. After the intensity of going through an adoption, coming home with our new 3 year old, traveling to another state to buy a new house, traveling back again to close on said house, then moving into new house, unpacking, and getting settled. I was ready for some down time LOL! We needed some normalcy to our lives. I think I can say we have found it and are really enjoying it.

The kids have adjusted beautifully. I had my doubts at first and was wondering if they would ever like each other. We had a rough start. I can now say with confidence that they like each other! They are inseparable and play with each other all day. Yes they occasionally have the normal squabbles but then go right back to playing again!

Ren is the sweetest little boy and we are so in love with him! He has the funniest sense of humor and is a little clown. He is talking in sentences and has the cutest Chinese accent. We are at the point where he is learning so many new words and even when he says them wrong it is hard to correct him cause its so cute. "Sleeping" is pronounced "Shleepling" by him. He sleeps through the night, all night, HALLELUJAH! When we adopted Eden she did not sleep through the night for over a year and she talked and screamed in her sleep. Did I mention she slept in our room for the first year??!! Random fact: Sleep deprivation is a common form of torture. Ren is happily shleepling in his own room :-).

I thought adopting a 3 year old was going to be harder than adopting a 23 month old (Eden). This time around has been a breeze. Our time in China with him was hard. Granted we weren't 100% having to fight our illness and jet lag while there. Ren grieved and he grieved hard through temper tantrums. Once home it was like he walked in the house and thought I am here now with my family and its OK. He is one remarkable little boy. He is very affectionate and did I tell you he loves his mommy now :-). Something he wasn't sure about while in China. For all those considering adopting an older child I would like to say yes there are success stories!! He has bonded wonderfully.

We have had many visitors since being back in Ohio. It has been so wonderful to see everyone and spend time with family. Caleb made it for a visit too and was her for 4 wonderful days. I think it was just after we moved and I still wasn't up to speed yet because I didn't get pictures of him!!! ARGH. Caleb we will take pictures at your graduation this December!

My dad

My brother Keith

Christian came for a week and met his new brother

Rachel and kids at airport waiting for her flight to Uganda, read about her trip on her blog HERE

Be sure to read her gorilla tracking post!

We Are Still Here! (and random pictures)

2009-05-25T08:25:00.021-04:00

We are still here! Although after not blogging for over a month I wouldn't blame anyone for not being here to read this blog, LOL! We have been running non-stop since we got home from China and it has been nice to get away from the computer for awhile after being glued to it during the adoption process.

So what have we been up to? Well since we returned from our trip we were home for one week traveled to Ohio for another whirlwind week (while still jet lagged) bought a house, returned to Ohio 2 weeks later to close on it and then came back and started the moving process. I would not recommend doing this after just returning from a 2 and a half week adoption trip with a new 3 year old but we survived (somehow), thank you God.

To say we have been busy is an understatement. Ren has been amazing through all this and is the sweetest little boy imaginable. He has transformed from the little boy we knew in China. China was rough for him (and us), but now that we are home he is the happiest, funniest and most affectionate little guy! Eden who had an easy time in China, came home and realized Ren was here to stay and her life turned upside down for awhile.

I can now say they are pretty much inseparable :-). They still have the normal sibling spats but are really working things through now. They love playing together most of the time ;-).

Ren's transition has been really easy. For those of you adopting I want to write an adoption tips post soon. For now some of the details you might be interested in are at 3 and a half he has picked up English really fast. He still is speaking Chinglish but also sentences in English! He is learning phrases instead of just words like "I don't know", "hang on", "I see you", "come here". He really resisted English while in China and the first weeks home and wanted us to learn Mandarin LOL! Once immersed in English he listened for awhile and then just started using it! He loves action movies and Star Wars is his favorite. While watching Star Wars he insisted that Yoda was a baby camel. I will never look at Yoda the same way again, ha ha ha!

It took about 2 weeks for him to totally transition to EST and now sleeps through the night. He sleeps really well and still takes an afternoon nap (YAY)!

I have not seen any attachment issues since we have returned. In fact having him here has pointed out some issues we need to continue to work on with Eden. This is a good thing though, and only helps us to help Eden work through some stuff.

For anyone adopting from Wuxi SWI, I would like to say that I feel they take wonderful care of the children and it is a wonderful facility. I was wondering how much they really worked with the children and if they had much pre-school. I think they did seeing how much Ren already knows. I would like to say that Ren was in foster care during the weekends and maybe nighttime. I think this made a huge difference for him. I found out that he went home with a young single girl who took a liking to him. I do not know all the details. What I do know is that there is NO organization that sponsors foster care at Wuxi SWI. Foster care there is strictly on a volunteer basis and there is no funding for it. I believe that people ask to foster children they have a special fondness for and the SWI allows them to foster them.

Ren and Eden at Grandma G's house

Eden in dance class

Bathtub fun

We took Rachel, Eden and Ren to the C*le Br*ther's Circus and had a blast. Eden and Ren rode the ponies and loved it.

Here is the human cannonball getting ready to be shot out of the world's largest cannon at and I quote "at 16 G's" !!! hmmmmm I think he would of been shot out of the tent at 16 G's.

Sneak peak at the new house. We weren't going to buy new construction, but we got a builders incentive percentage rate of 3.8% !!

My snuggle bunny

Rachel has been home from college before she goes to Uganda. She has been a huge help through all the craziness here. I have been helping her get set for her trip and bought her some gear for her trip. I couldn't let her go gorilla tracking in her Chucks!! Here is a picture of her in her jungle attire. (OK maybe she won't be wearing all this he he he he). Follow her trip on her blog HERE.

Update on the Home Front

2009-04-14T05:50:00.005-04:00

Things are going remarkably smooth here. You would think Ren has been living here all along. Oh I know that we still have adjustments and we are continuing to bond, but the changes have been swift and amazing. God has really blessed us.

Ren does not particularly like nap time or going to bed, but he has begun to let me rock him to sleep! He is an extremely sweet and affectionate little boy! He has now accepted me. I guess he just needed time. And why not, I was a complete stranger to him at first. Now I get hugs, kisses and smiles that would melt anyones heart (all day long)! He snuggles in now when I hold him instead of being stiff and pulling away.

Mark went to work yesterday and he hugged and kissed him and waved goodbye to Ba Ba and he was fine the rest of the day. Mark also got a HUGE reception when he came home, complete with squealing and jumping and more hugs and kisses!

Today Eden goes back to school. This might prove challenging to me. He is an active little boy who loves to play and he will be losing his playmate. We will see what happens. He is really pretty easy going. We still have some melt downs over the fact that he has lost his ability to communicate with us, but he is starting to use English now. Yesterday he asked me for an apple in English! I think he understands a lot more than we realize. He is a smart little boy.

Eden is probably having the biggest adjustment right now. She has to share mom and dad and all her toys. This has been a little hard for her. I think being back in school will help. She loves school and I can bond with Ren while she is there and focus on her when she comes home.

On another note Ren went #2 on the potty yesterday. We made a big deal about it. I don't expect this to happen all the time but hey, this is a huge step! At least he tried and wasn't afraid of our western toilets. For those of you who are wondering what is NOT a western toilet I am posting a picture of the toilet Mark took at Wuxi SWI. The smaller children also use small potty chairs. Here is a picture of what we call a squatty potty. The blue tile is the floor.

Home Sweet Home

2009-04-11T07:35:00.011-04:00

Eden and Ren in GuangzhouMark's beautiful birthday cake. It tasted as good as it looked too. The numbers are backward LOL!

Sweet Kevin with the most adorable cheeks!

The blue legs are Ren's. Trying to get the kids to pose for traditional red couch pictures.

Ren posing with Eden and his best friend beautiful Su Su!

Red Couch picture.

Family Red couch picture.

We are home and we are happy!! I am sitting here typing this while my 2 littlest, Eden and Ren are happily playing Lego's! they have been building things and chattering happily for the last hour. Yes we have our very normal "he's not sharing!" spats and sibling rivalry stuff, but it is all normal stuff and then they are back to playing. They are pretty much inseparable!

Our trip back home was very uneventful. We left Beijing at 6:30 PM so the kids fell asleep at their normal bedtime and slept the rest of the way home! The jet lag has not been that hard this time (hallelujah!).

So how was our trip in China? It was hard but VERY worth it :-). It probably wouldn't of been so hard had we not gotten sick. Dr. Gong met us in Nanjing on gotcha day and was a lifesaver for us! He is a wonderful man who comes and sees the children when you get them. He also checked Mark and I out and brought back Rx meds for us that saved us and our trip! Kudos to Dr. Gong!!! Anyone meeting him will love him.

I must say that adopting a 3 and a half year old was quite a different experience than adopting a 23 month old (Eden). Of course every child is an individual and every experience will be different for everyone.

So in the spirit of keeping this blog real I have decided to share some of my feelings. I am normally a very private person, but I feel sharing my feelings with anyone who is about to embark on an adoption trip for an older child or toddler might help. I knew it was going to be hard, and it was. We had a easy "gotcha" moment but the first week was tough. Ren bonded first to Mark and wanted nothing to do with me. This is quite normal, but it still hurt after waiting over a year for him and not being able to hold and cuddle him like I wanted to do. Mark took over the parenting duties the first week and was AWESOME with Ren. He was so patient with him (but maybe not so much with the locals, he he he).

He had many melt downs and huge temper tantrums. In public I might add. In China staring and pointing are not rude. It is just a cultural difference. So being out in public with your screaming child while everyone is taking notice is a bit disconcerting. Especially when they are pointing or video taping you for their amusement (yes this happened). We learned very quickly to just stick close to the hotel and to ignore the staring, these people are not being malicious.

When we first met Ren and during most our trip he was bouncing off the walls, sometimes literally :-). We had thoughts of "what have we done??" during our first week and was sure he was hyperactive (just keeping it real people). I can say with certainty he is not hyperactive. One of our Directors of our adoption agency gave us very good advice. She helped me realize that during the adoption transition sometimes these children's brains become very overstimulated because of the changes in their lives. I would agree that this is exactly what Ren went through. Now that we are home he is a very different child. He is cuddly (with me too, YAY) and very relaxed. He has a very long attention span now. So for anyone adopting from China, your first 2 weeks may not give you a good picture of your child's personality! Hang in there and wait! 2 weeks is not enough time to see the real child. We are probably in a "honeymoon" period now and I'm sure we will be tested, but really now, he is a typical 3 year old :-D.

The first two weeks were a transition for Mark and I too. There were a lot of moments of stress and times we just had to use humor to get through things. So how do we feel now? Sometimes the most rewarding things in life are the hardest things to do. We are blessed with an adorable sweet little boy who we are in LOVE with!!! We will never forget our time in China. We traveled with AWESOME travel mates who were so supportive and wonderful! Love you all and miss you too if you are reading this!!!

Thank you God for Ren and for bringing us home safely!

Packing up!

2009-04-08T00:13:00.005-04:00

We have started packing up today. We fly to Beijing tomorrow afternoon and have a 5 hour lay over (yippee). Then we fly straight through to DC. We are ready to go home. It will be nice to sleep in our own beds and eat home cooked meals again.

Today we go to the American Consulate to take our oath, get Ren's Visa and final paperwork. It is now off the Island so we take a bus and it will take up most of our afternoon. Then we come back and take the traditional red couch pictures at the White Swan.

Every day has gotten a little easier with Ren. He is pretty much a wild man :-D! He is starting to understand more and get frustrated less. He will listen if he knows what we are saying. His temper tantrums are now only a few minutes instead of lets just say a long time. He is a very sweet, compassionate, and smart little boy. We just love him and know it takes time for all the adjustments to happen, his life has changed so quickly in the last few days.

Thank you to everyone for the well wishes and comments! I loved reading them. Eden really enjoyed all the comments from Mrs. Faulwell and her class at Jenifer Elementary. Thanks again and sorry I haven't had time to respond to all of them but they meant so much to us!

2009-04-06T03:58:00.001-04:00

Guangzhou

2009-04-05T20:38:00.012-04:00

We are enjoying our time in Guangzhou. It has changed a little bit since we were here last and it is fun exploring and walking around. There is now a Starbucks here!! Yay!! The coffee tastes just like it does at home. That's kind of nice when you are a little homesick :-).

Last night we took the kids on a river cruise down the Pearl River. We had a wonderful time and the city was lit up like Christmas!! It was really beautiful. The kids really enjoyed it too. We all had a wonderful time until Ren wanted to stick his head out the railing of the boat. I did not feel like jumping in the Pearl river to get him so I had to tell him no. Funny thing is he doesn't like to be told no. Mark (my hero) intervened and held Ren while he had a melt down, emotionally and literally. Unfortunately while Mark was holding him Ren also had a poopy diaper =O. Lets just say they both had to change their clothes. Mark was a very good sport about it and we all had a good laugh on the way home in the Taxi. I'm sure the Taxi driver thought we were crazy!

Ren's Mandarin for a 3.5 year old is incredible. He has long conversations with anyone he can and loves to talk to the Chinese girls. He is such a flirt ;-). He has gone from being able to communicate quite well to hardly at all with us. We tried to learn as much as we could before we came but it is very difficult for us to communicate in Mandarin so we have many tantrums. I can imagine how hard it is for him. We are also using sign language and he has picked up well on this and even makes up his own signs!!! He is a remarkable little boy. If anyone is wondering whether to learn Mandarin before being united with their older children I would say YES!

Today we go for Ren's medical exam and then more shopping.

Last Stop

2009-04-03T22:39:00.003-04:00

We arrived late last night in Guangzhou which is the final stop in our journey. Ren loved the airplane ride! When the plane took off he turned to us and yelled"WOW!" Ren and Eden are getting along great. More later. Mark

Last Day in Nanjing

2009-04-02T19:42:00.005-04:00

This is our last day in Nanjing! Nanjing is a very interesting city. We toured a brocade factory yesterday and saw incredible dresses and clothes. Then we went to the Nanjing city wall and walked around. I got a lot of pictures but I am not going to attempt to download them here today (sorry). I will try and post them later in Guangzhou. Hopefully my computer will work better there.

We had a wonderful celebratory dinner last night with our whole group and our guide Anna bought Mark a surprise birthday cake!! It was beautiful and very delicious!

Ren is doing wonderful. He is smart and absolutely adorable. He is adjusting more and more each day. He is still more attached to daddy though, which is OK. I am getting precious kisses now so I don't need anything else!!!!! He is starting to use more English also, I wouldn't say he is communicating in English but he is learning. He speaks mandarin so well that I think he thinks we should learn his language. He is such a sweetheart! He loves seeing his friends in our group and they all are sharing their food and make sure they all have something to eat. He sings and dances, I think they spent a lot of time in class learning things!

I was initially worried bout Eden and how well she would do on this trip. She has been an only child in the house for awhile. She is doing really well also. There is the normal sibling rivalry but nothing major. We do have to have 2 of everything for now though :-). She has been a great traveler and a very good big sister!

Eden wants to give a big shout out to Jenifer Elementary!!! She says hi and she misses you , she will see you when she gets back!!

Today we fly to Guangzhou and stay at the famous White Swan Hotel. Our whole group is looking forward to warmer weather. The weather in Nanjing has been nice actually just a little chilly at times. Guangzhou should be in the 70's!!

What A Day!

2009-04-01T19:05:00.006-04:00

Waking up in China on any given day is exciting, but waking up in China on your 45th Birthday is especially cool! The best part is being with my family! Having such a beautiful wife and two of the cutest kids to share my birthday with make it the best ever, as far as I am concerned.

Today we are going to take a walking tour of Nanjing which should be cool. Ren is definitely a Daddy's boy! He wont let me out of his sight and yells "Bah Bah!" which means Daddy in Chinese.

Yea... I would say this is starting out to be the be the best birthday ever! I can hardly take it all in without getting a little choked up. Ren is already learning English words... Not bad for day three. He is a "charmer" Last night at dinner we were walking back to the table and he walked up to a pretty Chinese lady and smiled. She rubbed his cheek and told him what a handsome little boy he was. He knodded in agreement... I need to find out what the Chinese word for "little clown" is. He told the Nannies that he was Edens big brother, NOT her little brother. You could tell by the way Ren acted at the Orphanage, he pretty much ruled the roost during his tenure. Ren loves to see the other children that were adopted, and when he does, he talks to them and takes them food. Right now he is going through his photo album naming every person in the pictures. Did I mention this was the best birthday ever...

Mark

Internet Finally!

2009-04-01T05:35:00.009-04:00

We had thought we would be able to post pictures and journal everyday, but I have not been able to get on the internet. Broadband is a "relative" term I will forego telling you all my frustration with it. I have so much to share i don't know where to start. This is the first day I have felt halfway human since we got here. Our whole group has been battling a weird array ailments since our arrival and are all doing better now. Yesterday we finalized our adoption of Ren! He and Eden are getting along like two siblings do. The play, hold hands, laugh, and then fight a little, its all pretty funny. Today we went to Ren's Orphanage and had lunch. I was expecting duck bill soup, but what I got was one of the best meals I have ever eaten in China (Pic above). By now you have probably figured out this is Mark posting this instead of Elaine because I am talking about food.

Ren is a little "ham" and even marched up to the bell hop at the Hotel and gave him a salute. The salute was a little weak, but I will will work on it with him LOL. Ren is defininitely the right kid for us! Last night he told our tour guides that he tried steak once and liked it! He has a great appetite and will know if he wants or doesnt want something.

One thing I forgot was that sooo many people smoke over here in lobbies and restaraunts. It is a little hard on the eyes and lungs when you are not used to it.

Tomorow we are going on a walking tour of Nanjing. This city is beautiful! lots of hustle and bustle, people with all their possesions on a bicycle, but somehow its flow is a a symphony of chaos. Sorry for the internet problems (common here). We will try to post more tomorrow.

Mark

Gotcha Day video

2009-03-31T01:51:00.004-04:00

Our Day

2009-03-30T07:54:00.003-04:00

Wow! I don't even know where to start. He does Kung Fu, I am not kidding. He has a smile that is dangerous. He didn't stop moving till he fell asleep. He is bigger than I thought he would be and is stocky, and strong. He talks up a storm, too bad I have no way of knowing what he is saying. He told some waiters today he tried steak an liked it! He tells me Bu and Bu yao alot, this means NO and stop it! He has a little temper, well who wouldn't when you were taken away from everything familiar. He loves to play hide and seek and has the sweetest giggle. He had his picure book we had sent him and knew us when he saw us! He also is aware of Caleb, Rachel and Christian as his guh guhs (brothers) and jie jie (sister). He is full of life. He ate like a horse and shared it with his friends. i am typing this in my sleep but wanted to post something before I go to bed. This little guy is going to give me a run for my money. I am hoping he was just over stimulated today and that is why he was so active ha ha ha! Here are some pictures. Mark is still really sick but got some antibiotics today so hopefully is on the mend now. I will have him post some gotcha day video later. (Whoops looks like mark took mostly video of gotcha day and not many pictures. Sorry for the teaser I will make him post some video soon!!!)

We get Ren in a few hours!!

2009-03-29T20:37:00.002-04:00

Hello to All! I have had a really hard time getting on the internet. Hopefully it won't be like this all the time! LOL! We are in Nanjing and get Ren today at 1:30!!! We are very excited. Keep praying for our health. Mark is still sick and we are going to try and see a Dr. today. Eden and I are better but still coughing. We don't want to pass any germs onto Ren! There are others in our group who are also not feeling well. We all need to get better :-).

Nanjing is a very interesting city. We arrived last night an walked around a little bit. I will try and post more after we get Ren. I have askedd Rachel to also post to my blog in case I can't get back on.

Eden wants to say Hi to Emma and her teachers and class back at Jenifer Elementary! She is having fun and misses you all!

Sat morning in China

2009-03-27T19:19:00.018-04:00

I had trouble signing into my blog and could not post or download pictures. But here I am! We had a wonderful day at the Great Wall yesterday. It was sunny and cool, beautiful weather. Mark climbed the wall but Eden and I just went a short ways. She was very intimidated but the steepness and height. I was content to walk around with her and take pictures and enjoy the view. It was amazing to actually be there. Here are some pictures we took.

Today we are going to an acrobat show, and then packing up to fly to Nanjing tomorrow! 2 days till we meet Ren! Mark is still under the weather, but feeling better. Eden is feeling much better also. We all came back and slept from about 3 in the afternoon till 4 AM this morning. We probably set ourselves backward as far as our jet lag goes, but Mark and Eden needed to rest. We love Beijing and experiencing all the city life here. We hope to get out and walk around the city today.

More from yesterday

2009-03-26T16:38:00.007-04:00

I stayed up till 8:30 last night and was so proud of myself. I thought I had gotten a running jump on my jet lag. I slept for a good while and woke up refreshed at 11:30 PM! Ha so much for beating jet lag LOL! I made myself stay in bed till 4 AM and actually feel good today. So I found some free time to blog.

Since my photographer was under the weather yesterday my choice of pictures are pretty sparse, but I will have good ones later!

Below are 2 travel weary travelers who have just arrived at the Beijing airport. I feel totally busted now for having used my old skinnier photos on my profile and such. ACK! Here is Eden and her travel pal Tristan. Have Leapsters will travel! These 2 got along so well and entertained each other for hours! They both did sooo well for such a long flight! We are going to be with Tristan's family on this trip. They are a wonderful family and are adopting a little girl :-)! Praise God for good friends.

We are staying at a very nice hotel in downtown Beijing. Here is a picture of some really cool amenities we have in our hotel room.

I just had to post this picture. At first glance I did not know what was in these cans. They are actually masks in case of fire.

Eden and I made a trip out to the local Kentucky Fried Chicken by ourselves last night. It was fun. I actually crossed 4 streets all by myself with Eden in tow unscathed. OK well 2 streets it was 4 times around one one traffic light because I went the wrong way. Quite the experience if you have never done it. The lights are red the crosswalk is telling you to go and the cars, buses, and bicycles, scooters and carts do not stop. We were literally inches away from the moving cars and buses . Now that will get your heart rate up ;-).

Eden is feeling better today and Mark is on the mend. I am soo exited to meet Ren, 3 more days Wooo Hoooo! I can only think about this. I think I would enjoy the Great Wall more if we got Ren first and then went to the Wall (LOL), but I will do my best ;-).

We made it

2009-03-26T07:25:00.002-04:00

We made it safely to Beijing after a 14 hour flight. It was pretty uneventful except Mark and Eden got sick. Please continue to pray that we stay healthy over here as it can be a pretty rigorous trip.

We are going to go see the Great Wall tomorrow. Eden is very excited about this. I will try and post pics then. I am having trouble posting pictures tonight so the pics might come later so stay tuned. Thank you for all the prayers and good wishes. God is Good!

Its 7:30 PM and I am making this post short because I am running out of steam! More to come.......

TOMORROW!

2009-03-24T05:46:00.003-04:00

This will be my last post till we are in China! We leave tomorrow morning. It is kind of surreal for me today. I feel like I have been waiting for this day a long time. It has taken us over a year to get to this point. I have been telling everyone soon and the time would get pushed back for some reason. I really thought we would have had Ren home for a long time by now, but God knows best.

We will be united with Ren next Monday, so look for posts Monday morning EST. We will try and post pictures and or video! Thank you to all of you who have wished us well and have been praying for us! Your prayers are much appreciated but don't stop yet, LOL! I am praying that we all stay well, kick our colds, and a smooth transition for Ren.

TA DA!

2009-03-22T09:39:00.004-04:00

TA DAaaa! We did it! We got all our stuff in the above 3 suitcases! Whooo! Thanks to load master Mark who can pack anything! We are taking these 3 (above) with a back pack each. We may have to do laundry one or two times while in China but that's OK. It was a little challenging this time because we will be in 3 different places with different weather conditions. It could be in the 30's and 40's to the high 80's! I'm hoping for more moderate weather, 50's to the 80's, but I wanted to be prepared. We even packed bathing suits! Unfortunately for me I could not find my bikini (maybe on purpose ;-)). Oh well, I will enjoy watching Mark and the kids swim while I soak up the sun.

3 MORE DAYS TO GO!!!!

Getting Ready

2009-03-20T06:41:00.007-04:00

Five days to go! The reality is really setting in and the count down has started! We have been packing our suitcases and checking off lists. Funny thing is I keep adding to my list!! I realized the other day that we will return right before Easter weekend! So Mark and I ran out and bought TWO Easter baskets and goodies! How fun was that?!!

We are taking 2 big suitcases and 1 small one for 4 people, for 2 weeks in a foreign country, and we are trying to keep each suitcase under 40 pounds, AHHHH ha ha ha ha ha!! Not sure if this is gonna happen. We have to include entertainment for a 5 year old and 3 year old (who doesn't speak English yet) for a 14 hour airplane ride home. I could take a suitcase just for this stuff!! Maybe they will sleep on the flight home....well one can wish can't they?? ;-)

RIP Bob

2009-03-18T16:17:00.004-04:00

Loyal companion, foot warmer, a good friend, my buddy. Bob would sing (howl) to me every morning. He was a good dog. A lot of you knew Bob and were generally entertained by him. Bob had a ruptured disc in his neck and other serious problems. Bob will be greatly missed.

ONE WEEK

2009-03-18T07:28:00.004-04:00

ONE WEEK!

'Nuf said.

Where Will We Be?

2009-03-14T08:01:00.004-04:00

A lot of you have wondered where we are going in our travels. Mark suggested I post a map of our trip here on our blog.

March 26th we will land in Beijing and stay and tour for a couple days. We will be going to the Great Wall while we are there. This gives us a great opportunity to get acclimated to the 12 hour difference in time zones for us before we get Ren.

Our next stop is in the Province of Jiangsu. We will be in the capital city of Nanjing (see pic above). You can see that this is near the East coast of China right above Shanghai. This is where Ren is!!! We will be united with him on the 30th of March!! Ren actually lives about 2 hours to the East of Nanjing toward the coast. When ever you are adopting a child in China you always receive your child in the Capital City. We will stay here and finalize our adoption and complete some paperwork while we enjoy this city.

Then we fly to Guangzhou. This is a very tropical city in the South. We will enjoy our stay at the infamous White Swan Hotel on historical Shamian Island. I hope to enjoy nice warm weather while we are there. Everyone who is adopting must go to Guangzhou for their American Consulate appointment. Guangzhou was once occupied by the British and has a very interesting mixture of Chinese and British architecture set amid tropical palms and greenery! After our stay there we will fly back home through Beijing and be home on April 9th!

HERE WE GO!

2009-03-07T06:59:00.011-05:00

We know when we are leaving for China!! We've made our plane reservations and are packing our bags! Our itinerary looks like this.

Departure for Beijing China: March 25th!!!

Tour Beijing get used to time zone

Depart Beijing and fly to Nanjing: March 29th

Try to actually sleep

Gotcha Day!!!: March 30th

Meet Ren for the first time

Paperwork and meetings

Sight see in Nanjing

Celebrate Mark's birthday in China: April 2nd

Depart Nanjing and fly to Guangzhou: April 4th

Consulate appointment: April 7th

Enjoy Guangzhou

Depart Guangzhou fly home!: April 9th

This is 2 and a half weeks away! We are shocked and amazed at how good God is to us. This journey took a lot longer than we had anticipated but all the pieces are falling perfectly into place. We will be gone over Eden's Spring break so she will miss less school than I thought! This is a great blessing! On another note we were supposed to go house hunting over Spring break. It will be interesting to see how God works this out and finds us a house. He already knows where we will be living and how we will find our home!

We are blessed to be traveling with 7 other families! How fun is that!? I have had the pleasure of getting to know 4 of these moms, so I am traveling with very good friends! In the adoption world there has been a tradition to give your group a name. That's what happens when you have too much time on your hands. We have been dubbed The Posse. We are moms on a mission. I can't decide if I should work on a gang sign for us or maybe cowboy hats. What do you think?

Thank you for all the congratulations and good wishes everyone! I love reading your comments and e-mails! We will be posting from China and hopefully adding lots of pictures and videos to this blog. Please keep posting while we are in China! You can leave comments by clicking on the comment link below my posts or in the Guest book link on the right hand side of blog.

Did I tell you I'm excited?

TA!!!!!!! WOOOooo HOOOooo!!!

2009-03-05T08:32:00.005-05:00

We got the call that we received our Travel approval yesterday!!! We are sooooo excited!! We are hoping to leave for China in a few weeks and be home before the trade fair in Guangzhou. The next few weeks will be spent getting our American Consulate appointment which determines the exact time we need to be in China, buying plane tickets, arranging hotels, travel, and PACKING!!

Here we come Ren! Time to Rock and Roll!

All Good Things Come To Those That Wait

2009-02-16T08:41:00.010-05:00

Well we are WAITING to hear something any day now. Does DHL make deliveries on Presidents Day? Ahhhhh *sigh*. I am not going to predict when we will travel to China, I have done that already and here we are in February and still WAITING.

Our big news is that we are going to be moving back "home". We will be moving back to Ohio this Spring! Yay! When are we moving you ask?? We are WAITING to hear. Did I tell you I don't like WAITING? We have to buy a house before we move. That will probably be sometime after we get Ren. I hope to look for a house over our Spring break unless we are in China then, of course I don't know that yet. Can someone give me a "L", give me an "I", give me a "M", give me a "B", and a "O"!!!!!!!! What does that spell???.... Me!! LOL!! I am making fun of myself. I have not been real patient lately, but if these things are problems then they are good problems to have :-). Can't wait to spend time with all our family in Ohio again!

Meanwhile we are packing our suitcases and planning for our trip. Here is a picture of my new toy I will be taking with me to China. It is so tiny it will fit in my purse! It is a mini laptop, Asus Eee, to keep in touch with you all while in China. I took a picture of it next to a paperback to put it in perspective.

Here is Ren's suit case packed.

Who said boys clothes aren't cute! Here is Ren's Adoption Day outfit ready to go! This would look cute with a pair of Chucks, black or red? Note to self: iron that shirt before we go!

Soon

2009-02-04T07:16:00.009-05:00

Dark hair, silky or coarse

Little fingers, what will be the shape of his nails

Fiery or gentle

Snuggly or constant motion

Serious or funny

Shy or outgoing

Loud or quiet

Easy or stubborn

Kisses or hugs

Who will he be

Mine

Count Down to China!

2009-01-27T14:28:00.007-05:00

The count down begins! We received our Letter of Acceptance, signed it saying we accept Ren as our son, and sent it on to our agency who then sends it to China. Once China receives it they can then send us our Travel approval giving us permission to come to China and get Ren. When our appointment is made at the American Consulate we then know we travel 2 weeks before this date. Does that make sense, ha ha?! This means we will travel in about 5 to 8 weeks time. Hopefully closer to 5!

We will be busy this month applying for Visa's, checking into travel arrangements, finalizing details and such. This few weeks wait will be nothing compared to our past years wait. There is a light at the end of our tunnel now.

Please pray that God prepares Ren's heart for our family. Being 3 and adopted can be hard. He knows enough to know things are changing but not enough to understand it all. It will be so wonderful to meet him and learn all about our little guy. I had to bump his picture to the top of the page again.

“There are starfish stranded on the sands as far as the eye can see, for
miles up the beach. What difference does it make to save just a few?”
Smiling, she bends down and tosses another starfish out over the water
saying serenely, “It makes a difference to that one.”

WE'RE GOING TO CHINA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-01-16T13:22:00.005-05:00

We received word that we should be getting our LOSC next week. We are so excited!!!!! There is a light at the end of our tunnel! Praise God! That puts us traveling maybe around the first of March. Ohhh I need to go pack!!!!! Ren we are coming!!! I'm doing the happy dance again!

I Finally Lost It!

2009-01-14T16:59:00.006-05:00

Well it's official, as you can tell by my latest photo, the wait has finally short circuited my brain and pushed me over the edge. I am beginning to believe that LOSC (approval from China) is another term for an animal we used to hunt as a child called a "Snipe." I used to think the snipe was a real animal, and that things like LOSCs and TAs were real too! Now I am not so sure. Tomorrow will be day 150 in our wait to receive final approval from China. This is my first post to our Blog, and I needed to e-vent my frustration at the process. I know eventually we will go to China to bring home our Son, Ren. I only hope that our LOSC and TA come soon, and that my face will go back to some state of normallcy. Mark

2009-01-08T10:48:00.006-05:00

Well today is day 143 of our wait for our LOSC (letter of seeking confirmation). I have had days of emotional highs and days of emotional lows waiting on this little letter. Today is a good day. It is with great excitement that I wait for the phone to ring or even get an e-mail stating it has arrived. I figure that after 143 days of waiting we have to be on the tail end of this wait and it can't be long now. Sooo hopefully I will have some good news soon. In the mean time it is a good excuse to bump Ren's picture back up to the top of this blog so I can see his smiling little face. I love this picture a good friend took for me while in China. He just looks so sweet and guileless here. I can't wait to meet him!

The Chinese New Year is January 26th this year, maybe China will be working to get out letters out before they take their break for their holiday. This is the year of the Ox. Gung Hay Fat Choy!

Rachel is going to Uganda Africa!!

2009-01-03T09:04:00.015-05:00

My baby girl is going to Africa!! Rachel was chosen out of a group of students to work on a research project in the country of Uganda. She is a Biomedical Engineer student at the University of Georgia going into her fourth year. My how time flies. Wasn't it only yesterday that she was so little and needed me? Now she is off traveling around the world.

She has always marched to her own drum and followed her dreams. She loves Jesus and has a heart for helping others. She is the President of the UGA chapter of Engineers Without Borders. They are currently planning a project in Mexico maybe for next year.

This summer Rachel will travel with another student and a Professor to an area near the capital of Kampala. They will work on a renewable energy source to keep milk cold for local dairy farmers that have to transport their milk into town to sell. She will be over there for 8 weeks. Wow how our children grow up so fast. I am very excited about this opportunity for her and so proud of her. Why then is it so bittersweet to watch our children grow up and let them go?

You can keep track of Rachel's trip this summer here on her blog.

Happy New Year Everyone!!!

2009-01-01T09:20:00.008-05:00

I wish you all a Happy New Year! Wow 2009! I remember watching Sci Fi movies as a kid that were set in 2010!! That just seemed so far away, ha ha ha! It is with excitement that I enter into this year. Our family is looking at many changes. I think I can say with certainty that we will go get Ren this year ;-).

Of course I had thought that we were going to get him in 2008 but God had other plans. God's timing is always perfect, we don't know why it is taking so long to go get him, but God does! I have kept telling myself that everyday is a day closer! I hope Everyone's New Year is awesome and may 2009 be blessed!

My Girls

2008-12-31T06:16:00.008-05:00

Rachel has been home on her winter break. I have enjoyed having my 2 girls together. Rachel "kid sitted" for us as Eden likes to say, and Mark and I had a date! This could in reality be one of the last dates we get in a very long time, LOL! After we bring Ren home we will have to keep him close to us and not leave him with anyone for a while (I'm thinking a year, yes really) . We will need to do this for attachment or bonding purposes because he will need to learn that we are his mommy and daddy and we will be together as a family forever! Thank you for "kid sitting" Rachel!!

I have so enjoyed Rachel this visit. We went ice skating one day with my friend Becky. I don't think I have been on ice skates in over 30 years!!! I am proud to say I stayed on my feet but I will get no medals for gracefullness, ha ha ha! We had a blast! I learned that I need to work out more ;-)!

Our Christmas

2008-12-27T08:10:00.008-05:00

Reading the Christmas story

We had a wonderful Christmas! Rachel was home from college during her break, now all we have to do is get all our boys home. Caleb spent Christmas in Ohio with family! Christian spent Christmas in Austin Texas and Ren is spending his last Christmas in China! I look forward to having all my kiddos home at one time. Maybe then we can get that elusive family photo done with everyone in it, LOL! I didn't realize how few pictures we actually took at Christmas till I went to post some here. Most of our "pictures" are video, I guess I need to learn how to upload video on here next, ha ha!

I wish everyone a very Happy New Year! May it be blessed and joyous!

Merry Christmas Everyone

2008-12-25T11:51:00.002-05:00

Happy Birthday Jesus!! I hope everyone has a blessed and wonderful Christmas! This is the time to celebrate friends, family and God's gift to us.

I've been thinking about Ren and wondering if anyone has told him about Christmas and Jesus? This will be the last Christmas we are a family of a 6 and next year we will be 7! Wow! So for now we are thinking about all our family and friends near and far, wishing you and yours all the blessings of the season.

Please Throw Me A Bone

2008-12-18T16:47:00.002-05:00

Ok so we were supposed to get our LOA/LOSC between 90 and 120 days. Today is day 122. So I have decided I am done waiting. I am sooooo tired of waiting. I am over it. So Hellooooo China you can send my LOA now, I'm ready!!!!! Anytime now, thank you very much!

How Big Is God?

2008-12-13T09:15:00.010-05:00

I don't usually talk about other people's blogs. Mainly because I don't know the politically correct way to do it. I don't have those little bloggy links on my sidebar. Do you have to ask permission first before you link them or if they are public can you just do it and so on. Actually just having a blog is a major technological achievement for me, LOL!

Today I want to share a blog with you all that is about an adoptive family that is truly inspiring. If you have ever wondered how big is your God (or even if there is a God) you need to read their story. I don't have permission or even know this family, but I have a feeling that they won't mind me sharing their link. Their story is updated daily (with miracles), start on their side bar with Part One. In this holiday season it is a wonderful testimony and reminder of how God adopts us all into His family. Click here for their story:
A Place Called Simplicity

Ephesians 1:5
he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus
Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will—

James 1:27
Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is
this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself
from being polluted by the world.

Early Christmas Present

2008-12-11T10:28:00.012-05:00

As we wait to travel a good cyber friend is in China now to adopt her little girl. This little girl lived with Ren at the same Orphanage. While in China she got to go visit the orphanage to see where her daughter had lived. She visited the room where the children slept and the kids were in there for their afternoon naps! As they were peeking in the room a little boy called to their daughter, guess who it was?! Yep, Ren. Apparently their daughter and Ren are good friends and she took some priceless pictures of him for me!!!

If we can't have him home for Christmas the next best thing are these wonderful pictures!

NEW PICTURES

2008-12-05T06:46:00.019-05:00

"Gorgeous! friendly, outgoing...big smile, looks healthy. Needs help
with toileting, not completely potty trained yet.Very interactive and sociable!"
.

What a wonderful surprise we received in the mail yesterday!! New pictures of Ren!! We had heard that he could be living with a foster family and I was not expecting anymore pictures of him. The directors of our adoption agency recently traveled to China, met Ren and took pictures of him for us!!! From piecing all my information together he could be coming to "work" with his ayi or foster mom to the orphanage and then going home with her at night and weekends. Of course this is all guessing on my part from little clues I have gotten recently.

What a wonderful surprise for us as we wait for word to travel. We had expected to have traveled and have been home with Ren for awhile now. But because of new Hague rules and "other things", it has taken us a little longer to get him than we expected. We are anxiously waiting to hear when we are going! Hopefully it will be in the next 2 months or so! He looks very good in his pictures. All the swelling in his cheeks from the steroids has gone away. Notice "Pooh" is spelled backwards on his jacket, soooo cute ha ha.

Day 94...and counting

2008-11-20T09:56:00.005-05:00

Just an update as far as our adoption goes. We are on day 94 waiting for our LOA (letter of acceptance). This is significant because the LOA usually comes between 90 and 120 days! Once we receive this we basically will travel in 5 to 7 weeks give or take a few days! We are very excited knowing we are so close to receiving this piece of paper. We're coming to get you Ren, just hold on till we get there!! It won't be long now. I can't wait to kiss those sweet chubby cheeks!

Good Friends

2008-11-18T10:00:00.015-05:00

My friend Carolyn and her Daughter Keira came for a visit this past weekend! Eden and Keira were best friends when we lived in Georgia. They have not seen each other for 15 months but started playing together like they had never been apart. I have not heard so much giggling in a long time. It was wonderful to see my friend Carolyn too, whom I had missed very much. We spent one day walking around DC. We all met her husband Wolfgang downtown and enjoyed a wonderful meal at a Irish Pub with Irish music and some yummy Shepard's Pie. Here are some pictures we took of our weekend.

friends on the metro

Chinatown

Making our lunch at the China Town Express. The ancient art of noodle making.

In front of the FBI building

In front of the White House

Rachel

2008-11-09T10:45:00.011-05:00

In front of the Washington Monument

Rachel my oldest daughter came home for a nice long weekend to visit. She and her boyfriend Alex made the road trip up here from Georgia and we had a great time!

We had Mario Party tournaments and lots of good food all weekend. Mark made sure in a very Clydeques way that we were never hungry. We actually ate at Red Robin's AND Cold Stone Creamery all in ONE day. Oh where oh where is my treadmill.

Saturday we went downtown to DC and went to the National Smithsonian Museum of Natural History. Then walked to China Town for some awesome Mongolian Barbecue at Tony Cheng's. Did I tell you we ate ALL weekend.

I wanted to kidnap Rachel and keep her here, but she needs to graduate from college so I reluctantly let her return. Rachel and Alex are both engineering students. Here are a couple of pictures I borrowed from her.

Capital Building in the background

The Ocean exhibit at the Smithsonian

WHO said Mothers don't get paid???

2008-10-25T07:08:00.008-04:00

Priceless artwork the bunny ballerina

I am a rich woman. I am a mom who gets paid very well for the job I do. Sometimes I feel over paid for my job but none the less I'll take it. How much do I get paid you ask? Well let me answer that for you. Sometimes I am compensated in very unusual ways, sometimes its all about the perks, sometimes it is things you just can't put a price on. So here are a few of the ways I'm blessed everyday.

I receive works of art on a daily basis. I also have my portrait done regularly. This is very nice because my artist usually leaves out all the wrinkles, grey hair and extra pounds!

I receive flowers, my favorite are bouquets of dandelions

I also receive gems and treasures. Particularly shells, very interesting rocks in various forms of pink, feathers, and interesting unidentifiable objects .

I receive calls home from college on a regular basis from my college age children, Priceless.

Free comedy shows, specifically knock knock jokes that last for hours if you let them.

I get to attend ballet performances

I was serenaded by a Chinese Opera singer ALL day the other day. This was quite interesting and I must get this on video one day. This could prove to be quite lucrative and I could probably use the video to blackmail someone one day.

I attend fashion shows regularly

I am loved "a gadzillion 5 thousand 90 hundreds eleventeen times!"

And the #1 pay off I receive is the hugs and kisses I get all day long. Life is good.

fashion show

County Fair and Trivia Question

2008-10-15T12:31:00.011-04:00

One of the best parts of fall are the county fairs. We love all the fair food and will splurge on all the stuff we try to avoid the rest of the year, Italian sausage sandwiches, cotton candy, elephant ears, fresh french fries with malted vinegar..., Yum. Its not a trip to the fair without seeing the animal barns, I think this is my favorite. We couldn't escape all the rides with a 5 year old along. Eden had a blast and we were surprised to learn that her favorite were the Swings. She smiled the ENTIRE time on this ride. You can click on some of the pictures to enlarge them.

Trivia question: What is the State of Maryland's official sport? scroll to bottom of post for answer.

Its not a trip to the fair with out visiting the animal barns!

Eden is in fifth car back she wasn't too sure about this ride at first but ended up enjoying it.

Eden being lassoed

Trivia Answer : Jousting!! There are little rings hanging in the middle of the metal frames. They start with the largest ring which is 1 3/4 inches in the middle and go down to 1/4 inch!! This is about the size of a dime or lifesaver!!! We enjoyed watching the tournament and learned some interesting facts that day. And yes they hit their mark and speared those little rings! Quite impressive at full gallop.

If you look closely in this picture you can see a white dot in front of his lance, this is the ring.

Autumn Fun

2008-10-11T15:48:00.006-04:00

On a Hayride with daddy.

Pumpkin patch

Corn maze fun. This maze was in the shape of a rooster.

Cowboy Boots

2008-09-20T07:17:00.003-04:00

What is it about cowboy boots that make them so fun? These were just too cute to pass up. Here is our little fashionista with them paired up with her jammies, she is going to have them worn out before fall gets here.

2008-09-14T10:58:00.004-04:00

Travel to China is a adventure. Travel to China to adopt a toddler is a challenge. Traveling to China for 2 weeks with friends is a major blessing! We have been blessed to meet another family with Homeland, who will travel with us to adopt their little girl. How awesome is that!

Heather and I connected online through our adoption agencies message board and have been corresponding for months about our adoptions. Last night we were able to meet for dinner and get to know them more. I felt like we were meeting old friends. Heather and her husband Marty have a 6 year old son who will be going with them too and will be a great traveling companion for Eden. Their son Tristan is a cutey pie who Eden got along with well. How nice to have two along who can entertain each other! We also met Heather's wonderful parents. Heather's mother will also be traveling with them on their journey.

You know when your on an adoption journey for 2 weeks you can't always pick out your traveling companions. You are thrown together on bus rides, plane rides, and countless dinners, meetings and sometimes stressful situations. Sometimes we have fussy babies who can have melt downs. Not to mention being in a land where it is hard to understand the language and there aren't people to just call up and chat with. That being said it will be wonderful to have good friends to pray for, share laughter and tears, and adventures with our new children. God is good and knows what we need even before we ask for it ;-).

Happy Birthday Ren!

2008-08-31T07:58:00.006-04:00

Today is very bittersweet for me. Today is Ren's birthday. Happy birthday baby boy. Our "baby" turns 3 today. For him today is just an ordinary day and he probably isn't even aware that he has a birthday. For me I am thinking about missing another birthday but looking forward to spending the next one with him. Wow, 3 years old. I am so grateful that we have recently received pictures of him and get to see his gorgeous smile (a first smile for us). So today Ren I am thinking of you and wishing you blessings, God's favor, and lots of extra smiles and laughs today!

P.S. Ren's birthday is September 1st. Even though I wrote this on Aug. 31st. Silly me.

More pictures!!

2008-08-30T16:43:00.008-04:00

I think the picture says it all, what a glorious smile! His cheeks are still puffy from the steriod he received when he was sick but he looks very healthy now!

I've been tagged!

2008-08-29T15:25:00.009-04:00

I've been tagged! I have to answer the questions and then tag someone else. Sounds like fun so here goes. I have decided I need to get some more interests or something ha ha.

7 Things I Want To Do Before I Die:

See my grand kids

Travel the world

Take a vacation somewhere really cool with ALL 5 of my kids along

Take a vacation with just my husband

Settle down in one place I really like for a long time

Have my house stay clean for a really long time

Hike Bryce Canyon

7 Things I Can Do:

Love my family

Roll my tongue

Identify birds

Score over a million in Bejeweled

Play Mario Party

Make a mean chocolate Flourless cake (and then eat it), see picture Rachel helped bake this one with me

Sing along to Fiddler on the Roof my favorite movie (not on key but its a lot of fun)

7 Things I Can Not Do:

Sky dive EVER

Listen to country western music

Pretend to be a liberal

Sing

I cannot lie well

I cannot dance well

swim in the ocean after watching Jaws

7 Things That Attracted Me To My Hubby:

His good looks

His humor

His height (6'4")

His kindness and generosity

He's the opposite of me

His spontaneity

He likes to make me laugh

His compassion (whoops that's 8)

7 Things I Say Most Often:

"Cool"

"Have faith"

"I love you"

"Can I ask a stupid question"

"Have you prayed about it"

"Does this make me look fat?"

7 Celebrity Crushes:

Nicholas Cage

Tom Sellak

Brad Pitt

Johnny Depp

Takeshi Kaneshiro

Legolas

Vin Diesel

2008-08-26T21:01:00.002-04:00

Here is a video Mark put together of Eden's first dayof kindergarten. She thought she looked like a turtle with her back pack on.

LID 8/19/2008 (and other thoughts)

2008-08-26T13:33:00.011-04:00

LID !
We got the call today that we have a LID date, 8-19-2008! That is "Logged in date", meaning our dossier has been translated and is now sitting in the office of the CCAA awaiting them to issue our LOSC (letter of seeking confirmation). What does all this mean? Well it means we are now another step closer to getting Ren. The countdown can now officially commence to travel. Best guess for travel to China is November or December (maybe January). I can't think of anything to be more thankful for in November or a better Christmas present in December (except to have my whole family go with us)! I have been told that we are going to be traveling with a bunch of really lovely families! Yay how fun! I do not know officially yet who these other families are, some I can guess :-). You can bet we will be comparing dates to figure out who our travel group will be.

Other thoughts

Monday I sent my 5 year old to kindergarten and on the very same day my lovely oldest daughter turned 20!! Wow. In the meantime I have learned a new word to describe myself. A multi generational parent. I saw this description on another mom's blog, please forgive me for not being able to remember which blog. For some reason I am really happy there is a term for what I am doing. I can't wait to use it in a conversation when someone else would like to apply a term less flattering like "your bonkers". "Nope, just a regular mom with a few extra gray hairs, you can call me a multi generational mom". ;-D

Good News

2008-08-11T08:35:00.004-04:00

We have been waiting to hear how Ren was doing after he had been sick and we received good news! He is fine, no signs of any symptoms and his blood count is good now. We think he just had a weird reaction to a childhood virus. We were not really worried about it but it is good to know there are no lingering signs. Still no new pictures :-(. There is a group of people traveling over to China to be united with their children, maybe we will get pictures when they visit the orphanage then.

Other news, my daughter Rachel is home between college classes for a week. It is great having her here and we will celebrate her 20th birthday before she leaves. TWENTY YEARS OLD!!!! Wow kids grow up so fast, I'm getting in all the hugs I can while she is here. Eden has been stuck to her big sister like glue. Rachel is going to babysit so Mark and I can go out on a date. Now all i have to do is remember what a date is, LOL!

Sisters

Paperwork done!!!

2008-08-05T14:23:00.008-04:00

After six lonnnng months I can finally say we are done with our dossier (paperwork)! It is now on its way to our adoption agency where they will look it over and make sure its OK, then mail it off to China. Once arriving there it will then be translated and go into a pile where it waits to have the people of the CCAA go over it with a fine tooth comb. Once it passes that inspection, China will then issue us a letter of acceptance. We will sign this and send it back. Then... (deep breath)... China will issue us our Travel approval. This is their invitation to us to travel to China to pick up Ren!

Mark and I drove to FedEx yesterday with literally our life in our hands, OK life representation is a better description. What is simply called a dossier represents our life histories, blood, sweat and tears, months of work, inspections, many dollars later, and practically a whole ream of paper. OK maybe I'm being a little dramatic but that's how I felt ;-). We walked up to the counter and presented our package. Mark's hands were literally shaking, my stomach was in knots. The lady asked us if we wanted to declare a value, Mark and I just looked at each other. We didn't have to say anything to know what the other was thinking. After a huge pause we just said no. There is no way to put a value on those papers. Not because our lives are so interesting but because there is a another life counting on our paperwork. I am not ashamed to say we actually laid hands on and prayed over those papers before they were sent!

The reason for my excitement today is that our part of the work is DONE. We can now try and sit back and relax (yeah right) till the next step. The next big job will be packing, Hallelujah! Oh and did I mention shopping, lots of shopping ;-D.

Getting Closer! We got our golden ticket!

2008-07-26T09:52:00.015-04:00

This is how I feel.

Well we received the last paper for our dossier yesterday! The infamous I 171-H, translation: our permission from the United States Immigration Office to adopt Ren and bring him home! It is our Golden Ticket, LOL! This is a huge step in completing our side of the process. For every step closer it makes GUESSING (and I stress guessing) when we travel easier, it narrows down the window. We are thinking we might travel in November. We are hoping to travel in November, God willing. We still have a couple of steps, but we are thinking we will have our dossier to China in August and then we wait for travel approval. Travel approval is averaging anywhere from 90 to 120 days to be issued. Who knows, but for those of us adopting we take quite seriously all the work that goes into our wild speculating.

November would be good for several reasons. #1. The city of Nanjing where we will be staying is called one of four "Furnace" cities in China! :-O Jiangsu Province has four seasons with winter being cold and summer being extremely hot and rainy. Hence it is better to visit in the spring or fall. #2. The trade fairs are in October, they will be spaced out over 3 separate weeks. That means the hotel and air fares will be doubled and even tripled during those weeks. Also the trade fair means tons of more people and even more crowded. So even though we would like to travel sooner we are trying to look at the bright side of having to wait till November.

News Bits

2008-07-18T06:51:00.010-04:00

I have made a few changes to my blog. The most obvious one is it now has a playlist with some of my favorite songs. Because of this it may not be work safe for some of you. You can turn off your volume before logging on or scroll to bottom and turn the playlist off.

For those of you who know my son Caleb, I have added his travel blog. He is in Japan for a study abroad program studying Japanese language. You can find his link on the right hand side of my blog in interesting links. http://calebsdayoff.blogspot.com/

On another note we received another update on Ren. I have hesitated sharing this news because I do not have all the facts yet. I have decided to post this because I covet your prayers for him. It appears that he was hospitalized for 3 weeks but is out of the hospital and doing fine. He had a low blood platelet count and developed bruising under his skin like a purple rash. From what I can tell from my research this could have been a reaction from his immune system to another virus like chicken pox or something. I am leaving out all the boring medical terminology for now. We are waiting for another update and I will post as soon as I hear something. The good news is that he is doing well now. I am still processing the fact that he was in the hospital and I knew nothing about it till after the fact. I realize that this could be a blessing in disguise. It is one more reminder that we are not in control of this process. I thank God that he has a plan and IS in control.

Jeremiah 29:11 (The Message)
"I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I
know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not
abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for." God.

Wonderful Little Clues

2008-06-23T13:37:00.014-04:00

We received an update for Ren today!!!! Oh joy!!! We have been looking at our 3 little pictures and reading and rereading information from last September, wondering how he has changed. So the call I received from my agency this morning was very welcome. It helps us add another piece to the puzzle, to see a little more of the picture. He has grown since September...., well I know this is a silly statement seeing how this was 9 months ago. This is my son who I have felt entitled to since receiving our preapproval from China. The little bits and pieces, clues as to who and how he is are priceless at this point. I madly dashed down all the information given to me over the phone making sure I didn't leave anything out. I stared at my chicken scrawl with all the wonder of a new mom looking at a fuzzy sonogram picture, trying to get a idea of who this little person is. This little guy who will soon be running around my house and heart, and part of our forever family.

The picture above is a old picture from September 2007

Proverbs 25:25
Like cold water to a weary soul, So is good news from a distant land.

Ren is now 33 months old and is 36 inches tall and weighs 27.6 pounds. For those of you that know Eden, she is 5 years old and weighs 30 pounds! I think he is in the 75th percentile for Chinese boys for height and weight. He can walk, run and jump with both feet off the ground. He can stand on one foot for 5 seconds. He loves playing ball, table games and building blocks. He has very nimble fingers and can pick up very small objects with chopsticks :-D. He can wash his hands, feed himself and help clean the table up. He can dress and undress himself . He also is speaking very simple sentences like "I want a drink of water" , "I need to pee" ( yeah! LOL) and "I want a piece of candy".

His report goes on to say he can dance, is sensitive to music rhythm, and can sing songs. He knows red and green, big and small, and left and right!

As far as his personality goes it gives indications that he is very shy and does not like strangers. The girls that gathered this information said that he "cried very badly and wanted nothing to do with them and tried to hit them" (YIKES). Hmmm I can see bribes might be in order here, I am thinking chocolate. I know now that one of the best things we did was to send him pictures of ourselves! At least we will be familiar strangers! I can't wait to go get him and squeeze him to pieces. Note to self: buy M&M's, Life Savers, Hot Wheel cars, Lolli Pops, Cheerios......

Earthquakes in China

2008-05-23T09:13:00.005-04:00

For those of you who wondered Ren was not affected by the earthquake, although they would have felt the rumblings in his Province. This earthquake has had devastating consequences across China. My heart breaks every time I see it on the news. 5 million homeless, its hard to wrap my mind around those numbers. Parents have lost children and children have lost parents. Over 55,000 people lost and still counting. It makes my problems and annoyances seem very petty. Please pray that the diseases do not outbreak and spread now, this will be a big challenge. China needs 3 million tents just to house the homeless. For those of you that would like to help I have taken this from my agency's (Homeland) website and posted it below.

Please join us in supporting the American Red Cross efforts in
providing emergency services to the victims of the recent earthquake in
Sichuan Province. The Red Cross has a 4 star rating for effectiveness from
Guidestar, the independent charity evaluation organization. Please visit: http://www.redcross.org/ and
give what you can!

What's the Hold Up?

2008-05-19T08:22:00.013-04:00

Well we are still doing paperwork. The Hague Adoption Convention recently went into effect. The requirements are new to everyone including the adoption agencies and homestudy providers. I have been told that as we are all wading through this new treaty, we are the first group of guinea pigs to be fulfilling the new requirements. What is the Hague Adoption Convention? In a nutshell (I have taken this form the Hague website):

"On October 6, 2000 President Clinton signed into law the Intercountry
Adoption Act of 2000, the US implementation of the Hague Convention on
International Adoption.

The Hague Convention is multilateral treaty that includes 66 prospective
member countries. The Convention serves to set internationally agreed upon norms
and procedures for countries who participate in intercountry adoption. The goal
of the Convention is to protect the children, birth parents and adoptive parents
involved in intercountry adoptions and to prevent child-trafficking and other
abuses. "

This in of itself is a good thing for all involved, it is just adding to my frustration as it causes us to have to wait longer to travel to get Ren. On top of this we have to consider the Beijing Olympics. The Olympics are August 8th through the 24th. It is rumoured that China will not allow "adoption travel" during this time. They are going to have so many foreigners in their country during this period that it will be logistically difficult to deal with the extra adoptive parents during this time. The big question is how long will they black out adoption travel? It is rumored that it could be anywhere from the 2 weeks of the Olympics to 3 months! I am guessing and hoping we will travel to get Ren in September.

We are ready to go over there now and get him. Our excitement at meeting our new son is tangible and it is hard to be patient. I have to keep reminding myself that everything happens in God's timing and there is a reason for everything. In the meantime we have put together a picture book of our family, house, his bed, etc. and had it sent to Ren. I wish I could be a fly on the wall to watch as Ren first sees us and to see the look on his little face. Will he think we are funny looking foreign parents? Probably, but I hope he will look at us enough to get use to us before we get there. We sent pictures of our 2 dogs and I hope they don't scare him either! Poor Bob, our pug, is so ugly he's cute. I'm hoping it was a good idea to have sent his picture ha ha ha!

Here is a picture of Bob, I wonder if Bob knows what he's in for ?! And a picture of Ren's new bed and comforter set (please ignore the pink carpet LOL)!

YAHOO!!!! We have Preapproval!!!!!!

2008-04-22T20:18:00.004-04:00

We are doing the happy dance here at the Wolfenden household today! We got the BIG call that we have preapproval from China!! This is China's way of saying we have permission to adopt Xi He Ren soon to be known as Ren William Wolfenden! Yahoooooo! We are so excited, over the moon!!

Family news

2008-04-18T08:09:00.029-04:00

I thought while we all wait for some tidbit of news about Ren, I would update everyone on family news.

Mark has been busy this year with his new job at the Guard Bureau. He has been busy learning and getting settled in while traveling a lot for business. For his birthday this month he decided he wanted to fulfill a lifelong dream and go skydiving (gulp, not my idea of a good time). I was OK with this as long as I didn't have go watch him hurtle out of the sky or hear about it till it was over. He was instructed by me to call when his feet hit the ground. In true "Mark" fashion he decided to go AFF and not tandem. For those of you like me who don't know the difference, Tandem is where you are safely strapped on to another person and AFF (accelerated free fall) is where you jump out of the plane with 2 certified licensed instructors but once you pull your chute you are on your own. :-O !! Needless to say he did great and said "it was the rush of a lifetime". Here are some pictures of his jump, Mark is the person in the light blue helmet (click to enlarge).

Caleb is a junior at Georgia State University in Atlanta and is majoring in English and minoring in Japanese. He is currently engaged to the beautiful Natalie Huggins and plans to get married after they graduate. Natalie is an artist, and she and Caleb enjoy cooking together. Besides studying a lot Caleb is on the Georgia State Crew team, 4 man novice boat. So far this year they have gold and silver medaled in different regattas. This winter Caleb was accepted into the prestigious Waseda study abroad program at Waseda University in Japan. Only 50 students from around the world are accepted for their summer program. He will be traveling there in July for their intensive Japanese language program for 6 weeks. Caleb is 2nd from left.

Rachel is a sophomore at the University of Georgia in Athens (GO DAWGS!) and is majoring in Biomedical Engineering, with a minor in Cognitive Science. She is very active in campus Christian ministries, promoting racial reconciliation and attending ALL kinds of various events. Rachel's new hobbies include trapeze lessons and learning to cook different ethnic foods! She lives on Campus in a house she shares with 7 other girls and is enjoying the whole college experience.

Eden is in Preschool and has been learning how to read. Mark and I used to spell out words so she wouldn't know what we were talking about, ha ha, no more!! She will be starting kindergarten this fall. Wow, I'm having a hard time with the thought of putting her on a school bus in the morning by herself!! She is a very busy little person and keeps me busy. She has also been learning Ballet, Tap, and tumbling. I think she likes the tumbling the best. She loves singing and anything art. She is very excited about getting her little brother Ren.

Being a conspicuous family

2008-03-31T08:12:00.030-04:00

I tried to prepare myself for our first adoption the best I could. I spent months researching, reading all the books I could find. We went to meetings with other families who were also adopting from China, met with those who had already BTDT and asked all the questions. I felt ready, I knew there would be challenges, but there was one thing I really wasn't prepared for. Being a conspicuous family. Oh I had read about it, heard people talk about it, but actually experiencing it was something altogether different. This has been a most interesting albeit annoying phenomena to me. Our family is now an interracial family, that makes us look different, translation: conspicuous, we kind of stick out in public.

For those of you who know me, you would know I hate being the center of attention. I have never been comfortable with it and would rather just blend in. Now we are smack dab in the middle with other people seeing us as a white family with a colored child of another race. Notice I said "other people" because I do not view my family this way. For clarification there is only ONE race and that would be the HUMAN race. I do not care what color she is. Is this important? It shouldn't be but it is. I have had to acknowledge that there is a white privilege at work here. I need to be aware that when she is with us she will probably experience the white privileges we have and when apart from us she could experience discrimination.

So how do you prepare your child for that?! I will try to make her color aware rather than color blind. We will celebrate her Chinese heritage and teach her about her culture so that she is proud of it. We will celebrate diversity and surround ourselves with our diverse friends. We will teach her to have compassion for all humans and to fight prejudices and racism. We will teach her that God made all people equal and we have to extend that same grace to everyone. Having a sense of humor won't hurt either.

So what is it like to be a conspicuous family? People stare at you. Sometimes I think they are just caught off guard and they do the ol' double take. Some people give you the "stare" this is where they give you a look to show disapproval. I'm Not sure why they feel the need to do this. I get this one a lot from little old ladies. Maybe they think I slept with a Chinese man or something (Heaven forbid!!!!) :-P. Sometimes people go out of their way to smile at us or tell us how good we are. This makes me extremely uncomfortable. We had some selfish reasons for adopting too. One of those being is this is how we chose to build our family, not just to rescue someone. Our children are our children no matter how they came to be in our family, and they don't have to feel grateful for that! We love them all unconditionally bio or adopted.

My all time favorite thing about being a conspicuous family is for some reason people think they can say anything to you! I have had to learn to have fun with this one. People will ask you questions that would be totally inappropriate to ask a "normal" (insert sarcasm here) family. So I decided to create my top 10 list of the most stupid questions and remarks we have received. The only problem is figuring out the order! These are real questions, some of the answers are wishful thinking others are true ;-).

10. Q."Are they sisters?" asked while playing with a Chinese friend

9. Q."Is she your real daughter?" A. No she's our fake one

8. Q."Do you know who her parents are?" * sigh *

7. Q."Will she speak English or Chinese when she grows up?" A. No habla englis.

6. Q."Her eyes are really round, she must be a half breed" A. WHAT???!!! Somebody has been watching too many old sterotype Hollywood movies haven't you???

5. Q." How much does it cost to adopt" A. A lot, how much did you pay for your car?

4. Q." Is she your granddaughter?" I just love this one X-)

3. Q." Is her father Chinese?" A. Yes

2. Q."Is there anything different about her because she's Chinese" does not deserve an answer

AND THE #1 QUESTION AND MY FAVORITE OF ALL TIME! (this really happened)

1. Q." Are you going to drive to China to get her?" A. Mark "No gas is too expensive to drive that far"(and he answered with a straight face, wow).

"I was taught to see racism only in individual acts of meanness, not in
invisible systems conferring dominance on my group" Peggy McIntosh

The paperchase (do not read if sleepy or driving)

2008-03-28T09:12:00.005-04:00

Many people ask if it is hard to adopt so just for fun I thought I would list numerically all the hoops we have to jump through to complete an adoption from China. This is only the actual legwork and paperwork we do. I think the hardest part is the waiting and emotional turmoil you go through in the process, but that is a whole 'nother post. So just for kicks here is what we have been doing and gathering for the last couple of months (some are the state of Maryland requirements!).

fill out application to adoption agency
fill out application for Homestudy agency
ordered and paid for 2 birth certificates for Mark and Elaine
ordered and paid for 2 marriage certificates
gathered divorce certificates
had physicals to include blood work of ALL kinds (yippee).On a side note my lovely Dr. who I shall withhold her name to protect her identity will now be known as Dr. Frankenstein (because she likes to scare the crap out of people) took it upon herself to "make sure I did not have cancer because if I did she was not going to let me adopt". Good grief. sigh. Well the good news is I now know that I do NOT have cancer. :-P
Try to get Dr. Frankenstein ,a military Doctor, to have her signature notarized on the physical (wondering if a God complex at work here, not sure)
physical for Eden
notarized physical for Mark
clean house ;-), install cabinet locks, lower water heater temperature
arrange and have a Home Sanitation Inspection by county inspectors
install fire extinguishers, post fire escape routes, buy 2 fire escape ladders
arrange and have Home fire Safety inspection by fire Marshall
ask 3 people to write letters of reference
write letter of employment get signed and notarized
fill out financial statement/notarized
write plan to provide space for children
drive to Baltimore to have 4 (four) sets of fingerprints taken EACH (one is for FBI check).
file I600A at the United States Citizenship Immigration Dept in Baltimore
get child abuse clearances from state
get child support clearances
get driving record from Georgia for us both
provide IRS 1040
provide copies of all life and medical insurance
get dogs vaccinated
provide proof of rabies vaccinations
provide guardianship plan and letter
Take 10 hours of very tedious boring online adoption classes (some informative stuff but not new stuff)
provide homemaker letter/notarize
Provide all bank statements
have 4 separate visits with a social worker to be interviewed and basically looked at under a microscope. This is where the social worker determines if we are fit parents to adopt and if we are ready. Even though this can be an uncomfortable process this is necessary and in my opinion very important to the process.
When the above is finished we take 12 documents which have all been notarized from several different counties and take them back to the correct county seats and have them county certified at the court houses.
after county certifying we then get them certified by the Secretary of State
then by the US certified
then authenticated by the Chinese Embassy here in the US
Buy new copier
Make HUNDREDS of copies of everything we have put together!!! (one document alone can be 6 pages and we have to make 5 copies of it, then do that to 11 more documents, and that is just our dossier)!

If you are still reading this, this is just some of the stuff keeping us busy. I have left out all the phone calls, having documents reviewed, redoing documents done incorrectly, and the list goes on. This can explain the cost of adoption because each process costs something and is usually per person ,piece, service etc. This explains how we are NOT buying a child but paying for services and travel etc. :-P. So that is just the stuff up until time to get ready to travel, then the packing mania begins!!

About Ren

2008-03-19T16:14:00.007-04:00

More about Ren.

Ren was born in the Province of Jiangsu. This is on the East coast of China on the Yellow Sea. This is a Province that is North of Shanghai. He is at the Wuxi SWI in Wuxi City. Fortunately Wuxi SWI is a very good orphanage where they provide very good care for the children and have many activities for them all day.

Ren's birthday is September 1st 2005. He is said to be "speaking 3 to 5 word sentences and knows what no means"."He is able to dress himself and is cooperative". He is described as "active, restless, fond of imitating, fond of listening to music". "He likes to play with toys and loves sharing them with others". His report goes on to say "he likes using his brain and became interested with new things". "He is polite and gets along well with others. He loves studying and was a very good kid" :-). The last update says"He Ren is active and easy smile...sometimes he is a little stubborn". He goes to early education class and I have seen him in pictures of music class!

His report says quite often that he is active. Uh Oh! I think I need to go brush off the old treadmill and get on there!

His favorite foods are cookies and yogurt! His favorite toy is a toy bear.

He gets up early (6:30) and goes to bed early (8:00), yeah! same schedule as us! This last report is from September so I imagine he has changed quite a bit. I will update this blog when we receive more information. I can't wait to see more pictures of him and learn more!

"A person is a person no matter how small" Dr. Seuss

The waiting game

2008-03-13T10:52:00.007-04:00

Currently we are paperchasing. This is where we madly dash about gathering papers for our dossier. Our dossier is a boat load of documents that we send to China telling them everything they need to know about ourselves and asking for permission to adopt Ren. This includes a homestudy, birth certificates, marriage certificate, medical physicals,FBI clearances and the list goes on and on. We are doing this a little backwards this time. We have identified a child we would like to adopt first and our adoption agency is asking China for preapproval for us to adopt Ren. So while we wait for China to give us the OK sign that we can adopt Ren, we are madly trying to put together our paperwork and get it over there as fast as we can. When they do say OK we will be ready to

travel to China to get him!

Preapproval is the key here. China has the right to say yay or nay to us. If they feel for some reason that we are not the appropriate parents for Xi He Ren they may say no. So we wait on pins and needles, trusting God that if this is His will they will say yes! There is a lot of waiting for a foreign adoption, waiting for preapproval, waiting for china to tell you when you can travel, waiting for others to finish your documents and send them to you. Its a real exercise in letting go of control you don't have!

Meanwhile we have pictures of Ren to keep us occupied and wonder about what he is doing throughout the day. Is someone giving him hugs today? Is he having a good day? I can't wait to kiss those cheeks and squeeze him. Here is one of the adorable pictures we have to keep us wondering until then.

""Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a
pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used
up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- WOW-- What a Ride!"
Attributed to Bill McKenna,

Birthday Epiphanies and Why China?

2008-03-13T09:33:00.004-04:00

Turning 36 was the turning point of my life (for those of you counting that was 10 years ago). For some people 30 or 40 are milestones in their life. For me 36 represented the downhill fast slide to 40 and I was in a downright snit over it. This did not play well in our household. Mark would ask me what I wanted for my birthday and I would say "NOTHING". I had an all out pity party going and it was ugly! He was nice and patient at first but after awhile of asking he very wisely quit. My birthday comes and he hands me a birthday card. I open it and there is a note in there saying that he has given $50.00 on my behalf to a charity to feed starving children.

God has such a wonderful sense of humor. I giggle now even as I think of that birthday. That was the best birthday present I have EVER received in my entire life. It wasn't just a donation it was a wake up call, it was a literal revelation. It was like God said this girl needs some help and walked up and did one of those V-8 smacks upside my head and knocked some sense in there. It was like stepping outside of myself and realizing the world didn't revolve around Elaine and life wasn't about how old I was, it was about living and what I could do. Because I turned 36 years old somebody who was hungry just got fed (thank you Mark)! I realized that age didn't matter, the clock is always ticking so what did I want to do with the rest of my life?

This started me on a new journey and I decided I needed to be more thankful. While watching an Oprah show she suggested we think of something everyday to be thankful for. This sounded like a great idea. Geez what a novel idea (insert sarcasm here). Well that's how it happened sorry to be corny. As I thanked God everyday for something, sometimes different things, sometimes the same I came to realize something. I had a lot. Not wealth per se but I was blessed. I had love in my life, I was warm and dry and every night I went to bed in clean smelling sheets and was comfortable. I had a lot of food. I had a big house with empty rooms. I started to wonder if I could do more than just give to charities and realized I had a lot of extra time on my hands. Soon I began to obsess about those that didn't have what they needed. It became something I felt passionate about.

My 2 older children (who are the greatest :-) were getting ready to leave for college. More empty rooms... I didn't have a career...more time on my hands... it just seemed like the natural thing to do was to start praying about adoption. It fit. We adopted a joyful little girl from China in 2005. She runs around the house laughing and looks like a little sprite. We are now paperchasing for our son and brother. Why? Because we can ;-).

Why China?
I am frequently asked this question and am always surprised to hear it. Not because it is a bad question but because it was never a question for me. I had been hearing for years about the orphans in China and knew there was a need there, so it just stood to reason that is where I would go. It was just that simple. For me it was never about China having girl orphans or what they looked like or the actual country. I loved children + I had the means + Chinese child needs family/love = adoption. It fit together for us like a beautiful puzzle.

America has virtually gotten rid of orphanages. This is good in one way and bad in others. Obviously good because our children are not in institutions anymore. Bad because sometimes they are now stuck in the foster care system. The foster care system is set up with the goal to reunite the children with their birth families. This is a very noble goal, but often unattainable. They are placed in foster care because their parents are deemed unfit or unable to parent them. Substance abuse is a factor in 75% of these cases. Parents are given chances over and over to be reunited with their children only to have it fail and the child go back into foster care. The very system set up to protect these children have now put them in a vicious cycle. While we need good foster parents in America, there were a lot of factors to this scenario which would not make this a good fit for our family. We have/had other children in our household who need a stable environment that introducing a foster child could threaten, and I did not think my heart could take attaching to a child only to have them leave. Foster care is a very bureaucratic system that is not for the faint hearted. Please keep in mind that this is a simplified explanation to a very complex answer.

China has one of the most straight forward and consistent systems for foreign adoptions. While there are many qualifications to adopt from China it is set up so that it benefits their orphans who need homes. These children have been abandoned because of the one child policy and do not have a family or any known parents to take care of them. Some of these children will have no chance for domestic adoption in China. America protects the right of biological parental rights and actually makes it quite complicated to adopt foster children in America.

So why China? I believe God led us there. I believe he knew there were 2 children there that were to be ours. When something is right it just fits.

"I don't want to bring another kid into this world. But how do you argue against
loving one that's already here?" Martian Child

Ren

2008-02-22T09:21:00.005-05:00

Ren. What a great sounding name. Ren. Simple. Elegant. It stuck in my head. I questioned it some more. I had never heard of this name before. Where had this name come from? It seemed to be floating in my forehead where I couldn't ignore it. It was a tattoo in my mind . What an odd name. This was 2 years ago, 2005, I wasn't planning on anymore children, but if I had one I knew this would be their new name. I was mistaken about the new part.

Fast forward 2 years later and Mark and I started talking about a sibling for our daughter Eden. She at 4 years old was being raised as an only child. Her big brothers and sister were already out of the house away at colleges and starting their own lives. She was the princess in the household. Eden has been one of my greatest joys and challenges to this day. I have never looked back or regretted anything. Thoughts of going back to China and adopting another child started to dominate our conversations. She would have someone to grow up with, share life with, someone to challenge her kingdom and add some balance. So we did the only thing we knew to do, we prayed, and prayed some more.

We had moved to Maryland in August of 2007 one of the worst times for real estate in a long time. Our house had not sold and we needed it to sell in order to have a down payment to buy a house in the DC area. We ended up renting a nice house instead. In November of 2007 God blessed us and our house finally sold for a nice profit. Adoption which was once a hope could now become a reality.

How do you choose a child? God had now opened a narrow window in time. We could now proceed with this adoption. The wait to adopt another healthy little girl was now close to 3 years. This did not seem practical for us being 40-er-something parents. More prayer. We decided to go a different route. I started researching and looking at waiting child lists. The thought of choosing one child over another was something I could not wrap my mind around. I told God "I do not want to have to choose a child. You chose all my other children for me and they are all perfect for me, could you not choose this one"? The closest we could get to actually choosing was deciding on a boy between 2 and 3 years of age. This seemed practical to us because we had adopted Eden as a toddler, we understood the challenges and it would be nice to have someone close to her in age.

I felt driven. Its the only way I can explain it without sounding like a crazy person. If I wanted to sound crazy, which I don't, I would tell you I felt like I was going down river rapids in a canoe without paddles and I wasn't controlling the boat. Hmmmm. So there I was....looking at waiting child files on the Internet. I had only intended to look just to research and find out about the process. The next thing I knew I was looking at him. Not a picture, but a name. Xi He Ren. "Adorable little boy who is ready for his family now ... they call him Ren Ren". He is 2 and a half years old. My heart stopped. I reread his name, Xi is his last name (pronounced she). His first name is He Ren, He is a common name given in china, and "he goes by the name Ren Ren". Ren means benevolence. I needed time to absorb this.

I always knew God was merciful and loving. I sat on this information for a week. More prayer(aka MP). We decided to call the agency Ren was listed with and ask about him. They said another family already had his file and had a week to decide to adopt him or not. "Well God" I said "if he's really meant to be ours then that family won't accept him because he's meant for us not them". And that was that. The agency told me if they got his file back they would pass it on to us next. Two weeks passed.

If nothing else we found a wonderful agency by seeing Ren on their list. They are called Homeland Adoption Services in NY. They were starting a new expedited pilot program called Xingfu. They are working exclusively with 2 orphanages in Jiangsu Province to place waiting children. This was the perfect solution for us because we would not have to wait the 2-4 years it was taking to wait for a child. This meant that it could take 6 to 8 months now instead. Now we could adopt a child close in age to Eden and still be adopting a toddler and this was important to us. To request a toddler and wait another 3 to 4 yrs would put Eden at 7 or 9 yrs old!

God is good. I called the agency one day to ask a question. I had determined that I was not going to ask about Ren. If God closed that door I was not going to kick it open. I asked my question and got the information I needed and then the voice on the other end of the phone says "Oh by the way, I believe Xi He Ren's file is coming back to us and if it does do you want us to send it to you"? I can't really describe the feeling I got next. Elation would be a good word. Needless to say about a week later we got Ren's file. (MP). We sent in our letter of intent to China the next week asking for permission to adopt Ren and are waiting to hear back whether they approve us or not. So there you have it, our road to Ren.

Ren. I love that name. Simple. Elegant. Its still tattooed in my mind. I love the sound it makes when it is said. Some people will say I found Ren because I saw his name and sought him out. I know different, I know God had a journey for me and I needed to know where to go. It's not a new name, but a name given to a little baby boy born in 2005 and God whispered it in my ear.